“You
don’t want my hand in marriage, you want it in a sandwich!”
-Monsters
“Look
at this fella - so high on goofballs and grass, he don’t know what’s going on.”
-Semi-Pro
“These
are some of the happiest days I’ve ever ignored.”
-A
Futile and Stupid Gesture
“If
a helicopter goes too fast, will a police helicopter chase after it?”
-my
son
"It
is difficult to get a man to understand something when his salary depends upon
his not understanding it."
-Upton
Sinclair
“How’s
your town?”
“We
got a Dairy Queen and a Tastee Freeze.”
“Wonders
never cease.”
Fargo,
season 3
“Abraham
Lincoln once said: ‘If you are racist, I will attack you with the North.’ And
those are the principles I bring to the workplace.”
-The
Office
“Are
you okay?”
“South
of okay. North of cancer.”
-Brawl
on Cell Block 99
-B.P. Kasik/Phony McFakename
* * *
I exist on Twitter and Facebook and Instagram. And my Phony books are on Amazon here and my "legitimate" books are on Amazon here. Probably some other places, too.
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