Learning all about chemtrails. Fun stuff.
Also I've been investigating authors who find success with self-publishing and the consistent factors seem to be:
-It's an endless series
-It has to be sf/fantasy/romance
-The covers have to be generic airbrushed vaguely sexual photos of women in space suits or bodices
-They have to be available for purchase in print/digital, but free on Kindle Unlimited
-The author must have a ridiculous name
Also based on my skimming of their work, the writing has to be terrible.
Not gonna name names (especially because the author name in question is super-uber-ridiculous), but this seriously drove me up the wall: the first paragraph of this mega-successful Kindle Unlimited author's book talks about this doctor and the stuff he's doing. The next paragraph is like, "Bla, bla, bla," her escort said.
Wait: whose escort? Who is she and why is this her escort? I went back to the first paragraph to see if I misread it and the doctor was actually a female doctor, thus making this person her escort. But no, there were two male-gendered pronouns in that paragraph.
I skimmed a little further and couldn't find any other females in this scene, so at no point is the identity clarified as to the "her" to whom this escort belongs. There were multiple similar grammar/context boners in the next couple paragraphs. And this is the FIRST PAGE in the FIRST BOOK of a series with 48 BOOKS (and counting). THIS IS HOW THE AUTHOR STARTS? AND STILL FINDS SUCCESS?
I'm jealous. Yes, of course. But it also makes me think I'm wasting my time trying to make my books good and fun and clever. If I'd just follow the five rules above, it wouldn't matter if my work was any good. I would make all the money in the world.
But isn't there more to life than making all the money in the world?
-B.P. Kasik/Phony McFakename
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I exist on Twitter and Facebook and Instagram. And my Phony books are on Amazon here and my "legitimate" books are on Amazon here. Probably some other places, too.
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